“北京奥运会主题歌”英语歌词部分的低级错误
张放
马未都先生对两年前的奥运会从五大方面进行了比较客观的评论。不动气，不讥讽，娓娓道来，以理服众。是非区直，读者心中自有定论。此文风实值得俺等人学习与效仿。
于是，俺将当时写的一篇讨论“北京奥运会主题歌”英语歌词部分的博文，修改了一下严厉批评的口气，再挂出来，算是借马未都说评说奥运得失东风，跟着说点可能不同于一般见解的见解，供诸位英语达人参考。
“北京奥运会主题歌”有两个问题可能需要商榷。第一，英语歌词。第二，曲子来源。
先说“北京奥运会主题歌”歌词中的英语部分。这是我才从北京奥运会官方网站截下来的图（官方地址为http://www.beijing2008.cn/video/promotional/olympic-zhutige-mv/index.shtml）：
主题歌作曲：陈其钢，
中文词：陈其钢，
英文词译配：陈其钢、马文、常石磊，
配器：陈其钢、常石磊、王之一。
我和你，心连心，同住地球村，为梦想，千里行，相会在北京。
来吧！朋友，伸出你的手，我和你，心连心，永远一家人。
You and Me From one world We are family
Travel dream
A thousand miles Meeting in Beijing
Come together
Put your hand in mine
You and Me From one world We are family
汉语部分不用讨论，但说英语翻译处理上，出现了低级错误。全部英语单词加起来，没超过25个单词，却出现基本语句不通的语法错误，实在有些不太应该。
Travel dream
A thousand miles Meeting in Beijing
为梦想，千里行，相会在北京。
这句中的
Travel dream
A thousand miles
是个病句。把“Travel”错当及物动词了，并还发出命令，驱使“dream”走了一千里地。
Travel不能也永远不会这样给dream发号施令。那么，惟一牵强附会的解释，就是travel的主语是前面的you and me。但显然，you travel还算凑合（没有时态，会给人莫名其妙感觉），me却不能travel。真要把travel单个拿出来使用，有个意思，是篮球比赛常用术语：“走步！”。
即便忽略travel这个词使用上的错误，但将“travel dream”中的dream不加任何冠词，不分单复数方式使用，也属于中学生最常犯的错误之一。英语中的dream是可数名词。比如，杨宪益翻译的《红楼梦》：A Dream of Red Mansions；马丁-路德-金的著名演讲：I Have A Dream等，前面都要有冠词，并且重要的是，都必须有单复数区别。因此，Travel dream是典型的中式错误英语。
接下来，Meeting in Beijing中的meeting的主语是谁，词作者也就根本弄不清了。往回推，找了半天，也对不上号：谁meeting？估计应该是“You and me”,但“you and me, meeting in Beijing”，这还是纯粹的英语吗？简直就是典型的中式英语：you meeting？错。Me meeting？，还是错。You和me两个加起来，也不能直接就去meeting。大概词作者是想说“相约在北京”，于是就干脆玩了一个直接翻译，“meeting in beijing”。至于主语是谁，以及主语中的重要谓语有与没有，就都不管它，无所谓了。
这文章挂上后，有人很着急，试图将此文章河蟹下去。还有人拿出另个版本说事。但官方网站直到今天，还挂着的，就是我现在讨论着的。所以，不用再劳神拿别的版本说事就是了。
第二部分：曲子来源。
世博会前，有人说，专门为世博会写的曲子出了问题，它本来是（或者说抄袭自）日本某某人的作品，成了一时人们的谈资。后来，世博会放弃不用了。而奥运会的作曲者，则没有受到这样不被使用的“优厚待遇”。尽管有人提出，《我和你》旋律跟班德瑞乐队的The Way to Heaven《天堂之路》旋律有90%甚至95%以上相似之处，将下面的整个地址，拷贝到您的地址栏里，马上可听到《天堂之路》的旋律：http://box.zhangmen.baidu.com/m?gate=1&ct=134217728&tn=baidumt,天堂之路 the way to heaven 1 bandari 乐团&word=mp3,http://feizhuliu.monalisha.com.cn/up1983/media/pZqYq5avq6eZl5SqmqQ3.mp3,,[the+way+to+heaven]&si=%CC%EC%CC%C3%D6%AE%C2%B7;;%B0%E0%B5%C3%C8%F0;;0;;0&lm=16777216，其中包括节奏与速度，都相近到令人产生怀疑的地步。但作曲者至今没有作出任何解释。
最后，不得不加上一句可能有点得罪人的话：奥运会主题歌算很大一件事，由中央音乐学院学黑管专业的人来操刀写曲，似乎还算说得过去，但如果又写词，尤其写英语歌词，尽管听说该作者有很多时间是在法国呆了很久，那绝对不等于说英语语言关已过，或者说英语笔头很好，总给人某种不安全感。现在看来，这种不安全感的产生，似乎是有道理的。
____
另附：
1、雅典奥运会主题歌（英文）
歌曲名称：Pass the flame (圣火相传)
歌手：Yiannis Kotsiras
作词：Lina Nikolakopoulou
作曲：Trevor Horn
Pass the Flame
Unite the World
It's time to celebrate
Let our voices be heard
Pass the Flame
Unite the world
Bring us all together
We can grow a forest
On a dried up river bed
We can build a mountain
From a grain sand
Reach out, hold out your hands
Pass the Flame
Unite the World
It's time to celebrate
Let our voices be heard
Pass the Flame
Unite the world
Bring us all together
Pass the Flame
Unite the World
Reach out, hold out your hands
Reach out, hold out your hands
Pass the Flame
Unite the world
Pass the Flame
Unite the World
2、巴塞罗那奥运会主题歌（还是英文的）
歌曲曲作者是英国音乐家韦伯，他前妻就是给我们唱主题歌的莎拉·布莱曼啊。
Amigos para siempre（永远是朋友）
I don't have to say a word to you
You seem to know
Whatever mood I am going through
Feels as though I have known you forever
You can look into my eyes
and see the way I feel and how the world is treating me
Maybe I have known you forever
Amigos para siempre means you will always be my friend
Amics per sempre means a love that cannot end
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre
I feel you near me even when we are apart
Just knowing you are in this world can warm my heart
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre
We share memories I won’t forget
And we will share more,
My friend,
We have not started yet
Something happens when we are together
When I look at you
I wonder why there has to come a time when we must say goodbye
I am alive when we are together
Amigos para siempre means you will always be my friend
Amics per sempre means a love that cannot end
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre
I feel you near me even when we are apart
Just knowing you are in this world can warm my heart
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre
When I look at you
I wonder why there has to come a time when we must say goodbye
I am alive when we are together
Amigos para siempre means you will always be my friend
Amics per sempre means a love that cannot end
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre I feel you near me even when we are apart
Just knowing you are in this world can warm my heart
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre
Amigos para siempre means you will always be my friend
Amics per sempre means a love that cannot end
Friends for life
Not just a summer or a spring
Amigos para siempre
Amigos para siempre
3、最后再附加上很多中国人都熟悉甚至会唱的1988年汉城奥运会主题歌
Hand In Hand
See the fire in the sky
We feel the beating of our hearts together
This is our time to rise above
We know the chance is here to live forever
For all time
CHORUS:
Hand in Hand we stand
All across the land
We can make this world
A better place in which to live
Hand in Hand we can
Start to understand
Breaking down the walls
That come between us for all time
Arirang
Everytime we give it all
We feel the flame eternally inside us
Lift our hands up to the sky
The morning calm helps us to live in harmony
For all time
CHORUS:
Hand in hand we stand
All across the land
We can make this world
A better place in which to live
Hand in Hand we can
Start to understand
Breaking down the walls
That come between us for all time
Arirang
Hand in hand we stand
All across the land
We can make this world
A better place in which to live
Hand in Hand we can
Start to understand
Breaking down the walls
That come between us for all time
Hand in hand (Breaking down the walls between us)
Hand in Hand (Breaking down the walls)
看人家东西写的，语言功底十分扎实，不会出现语言歧议，更不含混。奥运会会歌被引入以来，还没见有人只使用25个不到的小儿科式英语单词，单薄地写出奥运主题歌。并且，居然还出现那么多语法错误。这是差距！
青春就应该这样绽放 游戏测试：三国时期谁是你最好的兄弟！！ 你不得不信的星座秘密