咏风 The Wind
虞世南(唐) Tr. by Petite (Ning Hsin-erh)
逐舞飘轻袖, You chase dancers and flutter sleeves,
传歌共绕梁。 And spread songs that linger round beams.
动枝生乱影, You sway branches and shake shadows,
吹花送远香。 And blow fragrance across meadows.
(英译诗的每一行均为八个音节;尽量地做到简洁 再简洁~ :) )
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馨评:上面是第一个版本,译得比较匆忙,不甚满意。主要是人称... ...下面的这个版本,干脆不用整句,而采用名词词组的格式,构成较为严整的“四音步抑扬格”。感觉似乎更好一些。
The chase/ of danc-/es, the flut-/ter of sleeves,
The lin-/ger-ing /of songs /round eaves.
The sway/ of branch-/es, the shake /of shad-ows,
The breath/ of blos-/soms ‘cross /the mead-ows.
【诗篇大意】
风儿轻轻地吹拂着少女们薄薄的衣袖,随风传来优美动听的歌声。树枝在月光下摆动,投下了婆娑的影子,晚风中飘逸着芬芳的花香。///长袖轻飘,起舞蹁跹,共歌一曲,歌声绕梁,经久不息。风吹动树枝,影子随之摇动,和风将花香吹送到远方。[儿童出版社《唐诗三百首》(3)]
【解题】
太宗的第四子李泰,封为魏王,他作了一首咏风的诗,请陪同的大臣也作一首,所以题作“应魏王教”。 诗人用抒情的手法描写了“舞”、“歌”、“技”、“花”在微风吹动下各种动态。
附:博友“rhapsodia”英译:
版本一:
Ode to the Wind
Chase dancers and swing their sheer sleeves,
Waft melodies to wind the beams;
Sway branches, therewith shadows shake,
Blow blossoms, their scent far to take.
You
And
You
And

